• Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Comes in a beautiful eco-friendly case with embossed silver-foil text, plus photos and lyric booklet. Graphic design by Pablo Mandel.

    Includes unlimited streaming of The Jungle is Dark but Full of Diamonds via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 7 days

      $15 CAD or more 



Maximum Gentleman
Turn a little one into a lucky lady lover gun
Maximum Gentleman

I check my email
No messages from you
Nothin' but newsletters
But I want something personalized

I'll see what got rejected
Maybe it went into my
Into my spam filter
Hope I don't get infected
I'll click this anyway
What do I see here?

"Your girlfriend loves enormous jang but the trouble is that you have small one.
Do not worry! You have wonderful chance to solve this trouble."


A thousand emails
Same thing, different words
Telling me, “Be her amorous exhauster”
“Hump like crazy all night”

“Your stiffer will be rocklike
Make your dick longer than the
Great China Wall, baby
Upgrade your meaty joystick
King-size your long dong schlonga
Excite your pistol”

"At present you can increase your jang length.
You'll be a king of bed for sure."

Maximum! Gentleman!

“Your rod is set to conquer”
“Amorous exhauster”
“Open doors and legs every night!”

Bigger! Harder! Longer lasting!


“College girls desire me
Cool dudes worship me
All thanks to my mighty rod”


from The Jungle is Dark but Full of Diamonds, released December 1, 2012
Music by Mike Bell
Lyrics by Mike Bell and various email spammers
Spam email reading: Elyse Jacobson



all rights reserved


The Living Vancouver, British Columbia

A kaleidoscope of classical chamber-music sounds fused with rock, metal, funk and splashes of world music.

contact / help

Contact The Living

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code